Now we are all aware that cheese is the fifth alchemical element. In fact, it has consistently been voted "Most Popular Basic Element," as well as "Basic Element Most Likely to be Confused for a Side Celestial Body." (Side note: Speaking of basic elements, I loved singing along to the "Captain Planet" theme song when I was younger. It was with great excitement that joined the shout out: "Earth, fire, wind, water, heart, cheese." Although, I am disappointed at how often the other Planeteers had to rely on Suchi, the Planeteer of cheese, to rescue Captian Planet. I know cheese is important. But, the writers really took it too far in this series. It is transparent how much influence the cheese-ists had during the early Nineties. I am surprised they didn't name the show "Cheese Planet," although that does sound tasty.) Fruit, on the other hand, was only voted "Most Likely to Come from a Flowering Plant." And that vote has been grossly tainted by Tomatogate. In fact, I wouldn't be surprised if the vote is overturned in the ballot recount. I mean, look at what the Charon controversy did to Pluto. (That really was Pluto's fault. In matters of planetary politics, you have to keep your distance. If you get to close to controversy, then you are going to get sucked in, burned, or torn apart. That is why I like Earth's positioning. Earth has been able to keep itself in hidden between the planetary giants, and the center. Get too close to the center, and Earth would get burned.)
Next weeks topic: Why green should be removed as a basic food group.
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